In Good and Evil, Heaven, Hell, Life on August 13, 2011 at 10:40 pm
Lately I’ve had this nagging drive to find the happiness and beauty in the darkness. I think I’ve experienced it, but is it really possible for such a dichotomy to coexist? Can we be depressed and elated at the same time (without blowing a fuse?) Might heaven and hell actually be the same place?
People talk a lot about the balancing act of nature. The sun comes up in one part of the world while it goes down in another. When a creature dies, another is born. While we damage our ecosystem, groups are mobilized to protect it. And the world continues to turn.
In my personal life, I feel torn between conflicting directions. I want to live natural and healthy but I also thrive on what some consider to be toxic technology. I want to be a mom but I also want to be an entrepreneur, a student, friend and dancer. I’d like to respect the religion and politics of all people, but my own doesn’t always find it easy to get along. Read the rest of this entry »
In Heaven, Hell, Life, Reincarnation, Suffering, The Bible on June 11, 2011 at 5:24 pm
I’m not sure if I skipped the midlife crisis stage or if I just couldn’t afford it, but all of a sudden I started thinking about the end of my life. Basically, someday, I’m going to die…. This is normally a conversation stopper, even if only conversing with the self. But I guess I got tired of ignoring it, or something.
Actually, I’ve learned that accepting our impending death is what people do when they reach their 40’s and 50’s so maybe I was just following the book. Either way, I am happy to say that I have found peace when it comes to closing my eyes on this life as I know it.
I mean, I’d prefer not to fall 40,000 feet to my death in an explosion of fire or lose a long drawn out wrestling match with a ferocious animal, but no matter what happens, I know that everything and everyone are going to be okay.
Somehow I had avoided the whole topic of dying for four decades. Maybe I thought in the back of my mind that I would be the one person to defy death. Or maybe I just believed that I was going to heaven and that was that. There was no need to concern myself on the matter any further. I made a rash decision based on perhaps some many quick decisions made before me. Read the rest of this entry »
In Deception, Heaven, Hell, Life, Politics, Sin on March 10, 2011 at 6:01 pm
Just when I think I’ve finally awakened to reality, I find myself awakening some more. Did I really once believe in a Nazi God that was bent on torturing and annihilating the majority of the world’s population? I mean, really? Please tell me I wasn’t a total muppet.
What makes me sigh even more is to think that I might have actually wanted to believe this. Sure, maybe I just wanted to shift the blame off of my own perceived guilt onto the rest of the world but… was I seriously okay with the idea of any soul being tortured for eternity?
And did German civilians feel similar to this after WWII? I feel like I’ve got some pretty serious psychological issues concerning the after-effects of the Christian religion.
To top it all off, if I think I’ve awakened but still find myself awakening, doesn’t that mean that I’m still deceived? I think I’ve arrived in glory land just in time before I realize, “Nope, I’ve still got a lot more mind renewing to do.” I haven’t finally arrived. I might only be a little closer to… who knows what? What’s around the corner? Read the rest of this entry »
In Freedom, Heaven, Hell, Life, Love, Universalism on February 20, 2011 at 10:50 pm
I love a good debate because it means that at least two persons are engaging their brains and passion in a controversy that might have otherwise gone ignored. There’s something to be said for struggling through challenges together. Somehow we can come out a little more enlightened on the other side, as well as exhausted.
I’ve noticed that some of the issues we often argue about are beliefs that we are trying to convince our own selves to believe. I mean, if we really believed it, couldn’t we simply relax and let the truth keep on being the truth whether anyone believes it or not?
Our avid defense of a certain concept such as say, God, can also be an indicator that we really don’t know what we’re talking about, but wish we did. Not that there’s anything wrong with this, but maybe this understanding can help us to comprehend just what we believe and don’t believe within our soul of souls.
Our real beliefs seem to dwell somewhere in some great unknown, such as maybe our subconscious, or what some people might call the spirit within. We can get glimpses of these mental truths through our words and actions, especially when we’re caught off guard.
Read the rest of this entry »
In Freedom, God, Heaven, Love on February 10, 2011 at 9:39 pm
After I stopped attending church about three years ago, it might have felt similar to squinting my eyes from the sunshine as I walked out of a jail cell, or maybe leaving a very strict and isolating home for the first time as a teenager. But it would take me at least another three years to accept my freedom.
When we don’t have the freedom to learn how to live in freedom, we become overly dependent on say, an institution to do all of our thinking for us. I really did not know how to responsibly handle my own cognitive abilities. And so I continued to resort to what I “know” or what I had been taught, in order to cushion the shock of losing it all. Taking responsibility for our own mind does not happen overnight.
But more and more I find myself very thankful that I got out. How many people escape institutionalism? I feel very thankful. And now it is time to explore and discover the real world.
First order of business is, who or what the heck is God? Read the rest of this entry »
In Church, Freedom, Good and Evil, Heaven, Life, Suffering on February 9, 2011 at 11:38 pm
In my search to understand what is good and what is evil, I found that both continued to elude me. What I once thought was good turned to evil. Such as church or even money. And what was so evil, such as sinners, became honest-to-goodness beautiful souls to me. But they could all switch places just as easily, especially depending on who you’re talking to.
Although I had heard the concept before, I was finally starting to believe that good and evil is not something outside of us, but it comes from within. Good and evil is simply my perspective on things, at least at the moment.
So, how does this affect my understanding of the Christian religion? Besides the psychological issues and the recurring nightmares, I’m realizing that injustice in the name of God is really not that big of a deal. And I’m wondering, is this what freedom from religion feels like?
This might sound a little heartless to all the people that suffer (including families of Christian suicide victims) at the hands of the religious institution; yet my entire blogsite might sound completely absurd to those who enjoy attending church every Sunday morning. And that is my point. One man’s treasure is another man’s suffering, and the reverse is true as well, depending on who we are and what we’ve experienced.
Read the rest of this entry »
In Heaven, Hell, Jesus, Love, Suffering on December 31, 2010 at 11:47 pm
This is a question I’ve been grappling with lately and just to warn you, I am not going to have a conclusive answer for you by the time you finish reading this post. But I have discovered a few surprising elements about this thing called love – however we might define it.
My dilemma begins with my 30 year belief in a Utopian type of heaven where tears have been wiped away and suffering is a thing of the past – forever and ever and ever. This is where love reigns and evil has been smoked out of existence and, apparently, even memory.
The problem with this concept of heaven is that it seems to be void of all reality. I’ve been coming across Christians who are discovering the love of God for the first time in their lives as they exit the church institution. This is a beautiful thing, except that they are so heavenly minded that they seem to be oblivious to the idea that suffering still exists.
While religion tends to detach us from the real world, I would say that discovering truth (or following Jesus – however you want to call it) should engage us more and more with reality. Our eyes are being opened. The veil is being lifted – not the other way around. Read the rest of this entry »